i want my own website.

i want my own web site.

fuck.

fuck blogging, fuck google adsense. fuck sara anderson. fuck today. i hate you may 6th. fuck keeping track of my life. fuck off.

how to save a life.

today was a day, just like any other.



i had school, i went to classes, i worked on my research paper. did i tell you about my research paper?



it is studying the effect of the modernisation/santitation of fairy tales, the effects they had on people and the effects sanitized fairy tales have on us, and how it is diffrent. my hypothesis states that with the santitization of a story, it loses its moral lesson. but that isnt necessarily true for the modernisation of fairy tales, my hypothesis on that is if the moral lesson still shows through the story, more people will learn from it because if it is modernised they will connect with it better.



^that whole paragraph is just horribly written, i am sorry, but i just talk about it so much that its almost too much. so i dont really pay attention when i do talk about it.



any ways we had a mock car crash today. it was scary. and i am glad i always buckle up. i dont text when i drive, and i dont trust myself enough as it is so i know i wont ever drive drunk. it is just. STUPID.



right now i watching doctor who series 5 episode 5. ill talk about it when im done.



...



done.



i loved the trees in the space ship!



amy's count down!! so cool!



the whole river song character! i want to know her story!! she is hiding something.



THE CRACK! IT IS FOLLOWING AMY!!!! WHY!?!



the whole angel in her head is amazing!!



and matt smith!!! so amazing and quirky!



his GREEN psonic screw driver :D



re writing of history!!



time energy!



Amy's blue chucks!!



amy all over the doctor!!! :O omg.

i went out to eat with my friends. we went to chipotle. for cinco de mayo.

it was good. im so full D: aaand we had dairy queen! too much

but im sick of all my posts being a breakdown of my day!! none of that!!

im colouring,

music:

decemberists 'the rake's song'

prom is on saturday. not sure if im happy or annoyed by this.

i just saw a group on facebook titled 'i hate being lied to.' no shit. im gonna join the group 'i love being lied to.'

tegan and saara 'on directing'

lily allen 'the fear'

passion pit 'sleepyhead'

i need to clean my car, and my room, and im just sitting here scrolling through facebook things ive already seen.

jeremy messersmith 'wasting time'

death cab for cutie 'soul meets body'

muse 'resistance'

tilly and the wall 'pot kettle black'

gang of four 'natural's not in it'

confronted sara. again. about how she doesnt give a shit. again.

i dont even care.

watching buffy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCF3ywukQYA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPDl2g8Upvk&feature=PlayList&p=75668CBD6A342880&playnext_from=PL&index=3

why did i ever like those!! haha brings back memories.

goodnight

may the 4th (be with you)

TODAY:

i woke up to find my parents, causing a ruckus, much like they do every year on my birthday.

dougnuts.

shower.

put on clothes.

put on my new glasses.

eat another doughnut.

check my twitter.

have a healthy glass of milk.

listen to a tune or 2.

head off to school.

1st hour:graphic arts, i recieved a card from eden, one of the best cards ive ever recieved! it has yoda on the front and says May the 4th (be with you) :D :D :D :D love it love it love it and it came with my first scratch offs!! FORTUNE COOKIE SCRACH OFFS! AND I DIDNT WIN ANYTHING!! it was awesome.

2nd hour:pottery, nothing special, got a lot of stuff done though!

3rd hour:research, my favorite class, also got a lot done here! man i love that class so much!! im doing my research paper on the modernisation of fairy tales and how the changes effect youth. it is very interesting.

4th hour:business, we watched a video on walmart and how evil it is. i didnt even like walmart to begin with and then that video made it worse. this class is technically where i did my scratch offs.

now im home, listening to the new jeremy messersmith with eden.

we watched star wars, ran around town, took pictures, went to caseys and dairy queen, talked for a few hours in my car. it was a good day. :)

So Im not sure if i blogged on the 3rd.. But to be honest yesterdays original post wouldnt have been good.

School wasnt

Rundown of my may 3rd:

me and mom went to roch.and got stuff. mostly birthday presents. i got:

_sandals

ipod charger

ipod cover

and some other mystery gift in the mail

also got glasses and a book for my research project

it was fun.

good end to a bad day.

may the fourth be with you.

(ps this is the official blog of may third)

Wow. What a fucking nice start to my morning. Mom was freaking out about god knows what, slamming shit around and gets me



not a good start to my day.

final performance and more.

So i just accidentally deleted my last blog post :[ im at the school again, Ill try and recreate the last one watched a little of buffy, didnt get to finish it! But i am really pumped to finish season 5! After the play i have so much homework :[ i just changed into my costume pants and they make me feel so fat and they dig into my junk and it is so uncomgfortable. Last play of my high school career. The rest of the school year is going to be covered in lasts. So unfortunate. But last night was fun, i hope i get more oppertunities to hang out with them. The doors to the school were locked when i first got there so i sat in my car, my hot hot car, and then the stupidchildren that were waiting by the door didnt tell us when they were opened. Little shitz.

The play went good. Nothing too out of the ordinary. But its all over now :[ i hope i still talk to all of them, i hope we hang out.

Im at home now, watching buffy, to be honest its gone down hill since last i updated. Im watching 'an education' its so good. i love carey mulligan. she was in one of my absolute favorite episodes of dactor who. she played sally sparrow! loved it, i really hope that her character comes back. british accents *swoon* british people *swoon* :)

i have doctor who to catch up on! :D love it love it love it.

i love when there is a refrance to something, and i actually understand it. like in ps i love you where they talk about mrs havisham, or in an education they just talked about jane eyre.

ugh i have homework to do, and i wanted to go to rochester and get library books for my research project.

i keep putting my homework off.

but id really like to see the new episode of doctor who.

photo editing pics for my poster in art. but im not sure they are going to turn out cuz they are older pics and its harder to work with, cuz its star wars x)

so if i remember right i said that buffy was going down hill @ the end of season 5, but the very last episode started off amazingly! and ended sadly and perfectly.

starting season 6!

what a good first 2 episodes!

got a really bad bloody nose, but its 11:30 now, and, ugh school in the morning.

A message from three in the morning.

Hey there all, im just slipping in to bed after a long evening of hecktocity. Inventing words is an enjoyable past time of mine. So the play went good. I did better than yesterday! Then i visited eden at work, we went blading earlyer, got some pics done for graphics class, that was fun. Watched more buffy, only 3 more episodes of season 5 and everything is coming together, i am very excited to see what happens! Anyways after i visited eden, i visited sara. That was beyond awkward. Her mom was there. So i left right away. For good reason. I was on my way to alex behrn's cast part. Which was really fun. I thought i was only gonna be there for a vouple of hours but seeing as i just got home, its been a while. I like them. Alex, beth, alyssa, aaron, casey, and jim were all there. Good people. Im glad i sort of fit in with them. Though im not at their level of intelect. We talked about a lot including abortion, hegerlie, general gossip, gays, watched the movie the happening cuz it was con
veniently on hbo. Overall. Good time :] oh and luke was there for a while! After a few hours it was just me casey jim alex and aaron.. I guess it would have been easier to say that luke alyssa and beth left.. Who cares, that was pointless.. And then we all left after the happening eNded. I locked my keys in my car so i had to call mom to bring me my spare, which was surprisingly painless, she didnt complain, or get mad, and i didnt get scared standing out in the dark. and that brings us to where we are now.

Until tomorrow

Farewell.

It is officially the first day of may! Well actually its 3:30 on april 30th, but this wont be posted until midnight. So im thinking that ill spend the rest of the day giving you a commentary of my adventures.

3:30
At this very moment i am watching season 5 of buffy the vampire slayer. Probably one of my favorite seasons. Dawn, buffy's 'little sister,' is one of my favourite characters. And spikes crush on buffy is so cute :]

5:30
im at the school now. Just left Sara's house. We were doing a puzzle. She seemed like she was ready to be done. Hanging with the crew. We have the play at 7:30. uuugh long night! Long play. Nervous. Blahh. Perkins with the crew.

7:30
the play begins and everyone is on stage except me! Awesome. Not that i care. Wwhy did i take this 3 second role?? blast it.

I feel so out of place with this cast today. Usually i dont fel out of place but i do...

Alyssa and Alex are who i usually talk to. Audrey too i guess. Emily V! :] weve talk on numerous occasions :] she reminds me so much of luna lovegood. So cool. Jayse is kind of annoying but bearable. Except i feel lime he is always trying to impress me. Idk. Casey and Jim are cool too. Beth too! She is funny. Aaron is cool but i dont think he likes me. Lisa and Karl are nice people. Kesley and Nick.. I dont really talk to them, or Sai or Nicolette, or Teagan. Overall, not bad.

Mom brought me in a meal that i cant eat! Cuz i dont want to murk up my throat with peanut butter and all the sugary treats she gave me. :[ but ill eat it at perkins! :D

10:30
sitting in elise's creeper van with lisa and karl on our way to perkins, we saw luke get pulled over haha scary. Im nervous about perkins, it may be awkward.

12:15
home. The night was........ Thats it. Nothing special. But its may now. Things are changing. Something big is coming, besides turning 18. Sitting here finishing the episode of buffy i abandoned to join sara's puzzle adventure.

i think this is goodnight for now. See you tomorrow!

I love that life feels complete and beautiful to me even though I'm 5 days away from being 18 and I've never kissed a girl. Never done anything.

Blogging every day in may. So prep yourself for a brief hiatus.

doctor who season 5 episodes 1-4 and buffy

just watched the 4th episode of season 5 of doctor who, and wow it was so good. just the fact that the writer brought back the angels is amazing cuz that was one of my favorite episodes from.. season 3 i think it was? yeah it was like right at the beginning of when martha is the companion, if i am not mistaken. anyways, so far this season is freaking awesome. the first episode was probably my favorite so far.. the whole back story on how he met amy and the cooking scene was so cute and the whole doctor backstory and how he was her imaginary friend and everyone knew about it, the monster was kinda ugly, but i liked the powers it had, and that whole story part. i really liked the whole camera thing where it was like the doctor thinking and the camera panned around people and stuff. so cool, very unlike past doctor who. and amy ponds whole story is just awesome, like how it was her wedding.. ugh so cool, even before it showed the dress i knew she was getting married, and then we learned that she waited 2 years! so crazy. and the crack in amy's wall! and how it is showing up in every episode!! ugh i love how amy is so tied in to this! so much more than any other companion, im pretty sure she is my favorite companion!

so after the 1st episode the doctor and amy go to the floating united kingdom in the sky, which on its own was such a cool idea!! and how it looked and everything and the back story of how everyone had to leave earth!! i freaking loved it!! the robot people were so scary! and i loved that whole story!!! and how it tied back in to everything! and then when we learn about the whale it all comes together, and everything makes sence, like how the ship had no power i was so confused! and then oh my god it just made perfect sense. very cool how the whale came to rescue the people, but i was a little confused for a while as to why they are torturing the whale in the first place, cuz it came to rescue them.. i dont knoww.. i loved it, especially the beginning where amy is floating outside the tardis, and the doctor is holding her by the ankle!!! LOVED IT by far my favorite image of anything ive ever seen in this show so far!! so so so cool and amazing. i really want a picture of it but i cant find one anywhere.

oh and before i talk about episode 3, id like to say that i love the new tardis! the outside looks so sleek and new and beautiful, and i loved when it was on its side and the doctor jumped into it :D so cool! and the sticker on the other door.. does anyone know what it is!? it kinda looks like it has a star in the middle. i read a bit of it, and it said something like st. someone or something.. i dont know, but it looks neat!

and i love matt smith! i think he might be my favorite doctor.. for me he just... clicks. not saying that i didnt like tennant, cuz i really did! but the first guy.. whatever his name was.. the bald one, to be honest i dont even remember much about him, just the episode where rose saves her dad and he has to die again.

episode 3: the daleks, i havent been a real big fan of the daleks, just because they appear so often, but this time i didnt mind them, and i thought the storyline of the robot guy thinking he was the creator was cool! and the new daleks were cool too! although the only reason i like them is cuz their colours reminded me of power rangers :) oh and did anyone else notice that they have big kabooses!! haha

episode 4: i really liked the elaboration of the angel story and the tie in between that and the chick from the library episodes, and how she knows the future doctor in her own past. ugh im excited and nervous for that to be elaborated on!! and im excited to see what happens next week!!!! :D

in other news im also watching a lot of buffy the vampire slayer, series 4 to be specific. i watched series 1-3 a couple years ago? i dont actually know when, maybe it was only last year.. i dont know but they had the first 3 seasons of hulu, so i watched them and then they didnt have 4 so i tried to find them online but didnt, so i gave up looking and just recently found out they have them on netflix online, and since i caught up watching doctor who on netflix and had just finished i started watching that! and i really like it! just finished season 4 and maybe it was because it was so new or maybe just because it had been so long but this season seemed so much better. love the whole tera character, and riley, i always thought that it was a bad idea to get buffy with a vampire so soon in the show (series 1 was the beginning of buffy and angel's relationship if i am not mistaken) cuz i always thought that they topped it off too soon, but then they went and beat it by partnering her with another "slayer" although riley is a diffrent kind of slayer. i also really liked his character and backstory though i didnt like the idea of buffy joining a government slaying business.. glad thats over. i am also not a big fan of anya.. she is such a nag.. i am really excited to see seried 5, so far my favorite episode is probably the very last episode of season 4 where they all dream and we meet the 1st ever slayer. very cool, and got me excited to see what joss whedon will do next!!

oh and i need more shows to watch, im running out :( wish joss had some more shows, and i wish he didnt get half his shit cancelled! god i hope they do more with it cuz epitaph 2 was so amazing! it blew my mind! god i miss that show. and firefly. dont know if i want to watch angel cuz if i am going to i should have started already. not gonna worry about it. wasnt really a big angel fan, i just liked the idea of him.


thats all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Neo6W1f7hyY&feature=popular

this movie looks kinda good. i loved the death cab song playing.

wasnt a big fan of the high school musical girl.. but her acting didnt seem so bad

"feel free to crush the milk carton" -my dad said to me after i finished off the milk.

what i said:

"ok!" -in annoyed voice.

What i wanted to say:

"Well your oldest son can feel free to go to college, but he is so unmotivated that he is sitting in the basement using up all the wi-fi, and im pissed cuz buffy the vampire slayer wont load because of him!"

no one fucking tells me anything.

what to blog about.

it has been so long!

why do i let myself get so far behind on keeping up!

i went on vacation last month.

we went ot cabo san lucas, it was fun, i enjoyed myself.
my favorite events were
-the zip lining! so much fun!
-the parasailing!!! amazing!

it is the last quarter of my senior year now. its sad actually, its like its all over.. i dont know, everyone else is ready to leave.. and i mean i am too, but i dont want any of this to end. i love my town, and i love my friends. we have all grown up together, and now everyone is itching to leave.

im just not ready.

oh yeah!

we had the state FCCLA (family, career, and community leaders of america) gathering in the cities, and it was so much fun!! prettty much the whole time was me, katie, alyssa, mariah, and kayla hanging out. it was fun.

so with all of these things at once (vacation and fccla) i have missed 5 days of school , which wouldnt be too bad, but that means i have only been there for 4 days the last 2 weeks, and 2 of those were half days for seniors, cuz underclassmen have testing! so really it has only been like 3 days! crazy!

classes this quarter:

-graphic arts 2
-pottery 2 (independant study)
-research
(lunch)
-intro to business

i am (for the most part) excited about my classes.

they are all fun!

and the funny thing is this week would have been my 1st whole week of the quarter, but i guess thursday is a fun day! were we just run around and do fun stuff!! awesome! :D

im in the spring play! :D it is our american cousin, the one lincoln was assasinated at. i play a soldier! one that has 3 lines! (perfect!) but while i was gone (vacation and fccla) i missed like 6 practices, and i guess they rearranged the whole cast! and they considered not even having a play! D: ugh and i still have to make sets!! arggg. that is always scary, i dont really know how i feel about doing that again. but im sure ill get it done!

and heres the kicker.

i dont know. im not going to tell you that story. its too personal. i dont even know.

im going to update more!

for myself.

not for you.



have a nice evening.







goodbye now.



xxxxxxx

made for my graphic design class. it explains me.

My parents got mad at me for changing my socks after i stepped in rylee's ]my dog's] throwup. 'it was dry' they said. I do

i am sorry to anyone this offends, but personally i dont believe praying does anything. when it comes to wanting things to change, or for god to take over or something. if you want something to change, you have to change it yourself. you have to take it into your own hands, not let god deal with all of your shit. because im sorry but i feel like god is just an easy solution for unsolvable porblems, death being one of them. just sayin. and that is a PERSONAL OPINION.

watching doctor who as of late. i love it.

im currently on series 3. martha is my favorite companion so far, though i do miss rose sometimes..

also! im listening to the fantastic mr. fox soundtrack because its my favorite movie :D i had to go to roch on friday to get it!!! loveitloveit. my favorite characters are ash and kristofferson :)